Back in Utah!

Tonight is joy defined.

J  esus has a perfect plan for my life as He blesses me with the privilege to serve

O  thers at the Christian school and in my community with my Utah mountains reflecting on the

Y  esterdays and hopefully resting in Him for the tomorrows.


As the song says, I love Him better every D - A - Y.
God is so unceasingly good to me.

It's Okay to Try

Lessons on Teaching

It can be quite painful to your pride but also highly beneficial to watch a video of yourself speaking in front of an audience. 

At least that's how it was for me tonight, reviewing some videos from student-teaching in South Africa. I was thrilled at the novelty of being there; I desired to show my heart transparently and show the kids that I just loved them.....

But I don't think that was always conveyed in the way I taught them. When I go back and watch the videos, the tape does not always clearly reveal that I was completely taken with these kids and wanting to see them grow. Watching Sarah teach her 6th graders, I see how much I was missing out on the fun angle, the dramatic love of life that she so readily shares with her class. And while I'm not saying my whole personality should change in order to "wow" them, I am learning more and more that teaching is a chance for your whole personality to shine through. 

There is a reason God made me the way He did, and rather than use that to brag on myself or share endless information in front of my young audience, it CAN be used to pour myself into loving them. 

Because in retrospect, I wish I could work all the harder not just to be good at teaching them, but to build relationships with them. In a book I looked at today on teaching, there was a quote from an 11 year old girl in New Mexico who just said, 

"The greatest teacher of all.... just wants to be my friend." 

I think there's a whole bunch of truth in that statement. Even though it is a job, the kids should never ever wonder if I like being around them. They should be confident in the fact that not only do I want them to grow, but I love them for who they are RIGHT NOW. 

I am fully confident in the fact that the Lord has me here in the States learning and growing in my skills as a good teacher. I see that once again after visiting Pinedale's public school today to see Kagan Cooperative learning style and learn things to incorporate into my classroom. It was so good! 

Yet my ever-present thought was, "Could this be used in a country like South Africa? How would it be received? Do they already practice this, or is it primarily an American ideal?" I wonder if the Lord is constantly showing me these lessons on teaching - through internet, through Sarah Pitchford, and through assessment of my own methods - in order to prepare me for what He has down the road. 

I admit, I would love to pursue my education, perhaps even work on a master's degree. I want to be GOOD at what I love to do. 

Yet, the highest concept of success in my mind still remains 

in that brick schoolroom underneath the blazing and beautiful

African sun. 

As much as I know I need to grow, that is still where I long to be. 

Highlights

- Sleeping in

- Horseback ride

- Picking up the pizza

- Duck Dynasty

- Painting nails with the kiddos

- Phone call with mom

I'm not feeling very eloquent, but I am feeling very full :-)

Give the Sunshine

One major mark of good leadership is knowing what to say, when to say it.

Staying with Dani and Leslie over the last couple of days was like a refreshing wave of crystal clear water surging over me! We had late-night talks and gorgeous mountain drives. And we laughed and laughed. It felt so good. A merry heart really is like a medicine.

One of those night-time conversations included Dani and I discussing what it's truly like being on the program team up at camp. This is the position that puts you in charge of activities varying from flag-raising, to games, to skits, to singing - pretty much anything that involves a day-in-the-life of camp. Even when you're frazzled (what you think is beyond repair!) you still cannot let on to just anyone who comes along.

Instead of spilling your woes to the first person to ask how you are doing, a good leader focuses on how someone else's day is, looking on the things of others rather than their own things. "What struggles are looming in front of THEM today?" "What can I do to love on them and leave them more full of hope than when we had this encounter?"

This is tough for me sometimes, because I want so much to find the balance between authenticity and courtesy, or between realism and optimism. Keeping information within the sphere of people who need to know is crucial for the team (and for the leader) to come out ahead.

I found a scrap of paper in the Pitchford household with this fitting quote scribbled on it -

"Give people the sunshine; give the rest to Jesus." 

I like that the more I think about it. HE is fully capable to bear every burden. There is nothing He does not want to hear about. Nothing too small or too tough.
But it's not enough to just take it to Him.
The final step is to leave it with Him. When I let Christ cast away my burdens and doctor up my bruises then what flows out in my conversations and friendships

is sunshine. Pure sunshine.

The tough things will still show up, and they might even be appropriate to share if it will be an encouragement to another or if it's a friend who will pray over the problem.
It IS possible to be genuine and grateful at the same time.

Katie Davis is a huge example of this. (Her blog is chock-full of lives in Uganda struggling for survival, but she ends every post with hope and gratitude.)
Dani and Leslie do this.
And I left their house today filled up to the brim with hope and gratitude.

lol see don't these look like sunshine-y people to you??

Happy Easter!

Thank you, Jesus, for giving me a reason to get up and celebrate.

(Not just this Sunday, but every day of my life!)


Romans 4 - "Imputed righteousness" means that God is now able to treat me as if I had never sinned against Him. Wow! God, give me grace to understand this mind-blowing concept.

What if?

What if all the time I spent

worrying if I'm liked

and if I'm doing it right

was INSTEAD devoted to prayer

and focused on how others are truly doing

and the status of the war

that is being fought daily

on spiritual fronts?


I wonder how many blessings and victories I miss out on
because my focus is not in the right place.

HELLO Spring Break

It's nice to see you here.


I have really been very terrible about getting online, especially to do any blogging. But my (very good) excuse for it is that I no longer have internet at home.
And that's because I'm cheap. If it's really not a need, then it's not a big enough priority right now.

But for Spring break I'll be at Sarah's house in Wyoming, which DOES have free access to internet. So I'll plan to be posting during my break, which I'm pretty stoked for, and I'm sure you will be too, Mom. ;-)

Here's a picture of one of the horseback ride from today. You cannot tell from the picture alone, but it even snowed during that time! I was so blessed to ride Talia, the very best horse, hands down.

This was taken at the end of the ride, so she looks ready to be home, but she really did enjoy herself.
How could she not have? She had me for a rider, after all.  ;-)

Okay, now for bedtime. We've got an all-church Easter egg hunt to look forward to tomorrow. Well, probably just the kiddos will be doing the hunting, but I would certainly look forward to an egg hunt that permitted the adults to join in too!
     We diligently dyed the eggs for it today (except for the two of you who shall remain nameless, who sneaked away to go shopping....) I do believe that's the first time I've ever used the word "sneaked" correctly in a sentence before. Doesn't it seem like it should read, "snuck"? But it shouldn't!
Anyways, that was the second time of dying eggs in all my life, and neither time has been at home. But Mom, because I know you're reading this, I think you should consider doing it with Wes this year. It's a very rewarding tradition!

That's my rather long 2 cents. I'll stop rambling so I can pick up my fun-book before I crash. I just love Spring break! Reason # 4,357 why being a teacher is the BEST job in the world :-)

Do's and Don'ts of Teaching

As of the past few weeks I've been literally LIVING in the classroom. I guess it's just always been my view of first-year-teaching. In order to be good you have to be prepared.

While yes, that is true. I realized over this weekend that the greatest teacher is a well-balanced one. My goal for this week is to make my life about the kids, not about the lesson plans.

Don't lose sight of enjoying these kiddos.
Don't miss out on making connections to their lives.
Don't throw away the discipleship for the classroom order.

Do enter the job every day with a prayer for wisdom to have the right responses to whatever monkey-wrenches get thrown into the day!

It is probably not the best time for a post after a discouraging day. But I do have 'em sometimes, and I need to refocus and move on.... It is not the end of my teaching career as I know it. :-)

A Compliment

At work on Christmas Eve, one of my tables told me I look just like Alexis Bledel. I haven't heard that in a while, but it was pretty cool! (I always thought she was adorable :-)      At work on                         

       

New Territory

"Let your faith be bigger than your fear." 

Does the Blues Clues Song Ring a Bell?

I love getting mail.

Seriously. It's such a little thing, but I think one of the coolest things is getting a fun card from a friend.

As of tonight, I have three recent cards propped up next to my laptop, with bright greens and oranges and blues..... They coordinate with each other quite well actually.

Plus they are a constant reminder of three dear college friends who just happened to be thinking of me :-)

I'm not really sure why I'm posting this. I guess just because it's on my desk so it's on my mind. Thanks to Johanna, Erin, and Steph. Love them!

Revisiting yesterday: WHY?

I was contemplating more in depth my post from yesterday; WHY is prayer the biggest way to show my care for someone?....

* It is selfless. The kindest act I could do for someone, and yet I receive the least notice for it (at least this side of heaven). They may never even know I prayed for them, but they don't need to. Then God gets the glory instead. 

* What is my human striving really going to be worth in their life without GOD at work in their heart and in their circumstances? He is the one - the only one - who actually has the power to bring about change. Wouldn't it be better for me to appeal to Him first and foremost? 

* Prayer is literally a way to summon divine power on their behalf (how amazing is that!?) and if I with-hold that plea, how can I say I truly care about their well-being?

* There is no limit to how much prayer can be done. Some acts of kindness can only go so far without being misunderstood or misinterpreted. Once the line is crossed, it can be even more of a hindrance than a help. 

But prayer is LIMITLESS. The biggest thing that I can imagine they need, I can beg God for in prayer. The most time I can afford to spend, I can devote to prayer. 

* Lastly, prayer takes the seeds of love that have sprung up in my heart and grows them to {epic :-)} proportions beyond what I could possibly achieve on my own. If I want to see my love for people in this world increase, then it will go hand in hand with the increase in my prayer life. 

"I pray for __________ because I love them" 

is soon flip-flopped into 

"I love ____________ because I pray for them." 

See? That little prayer for someone you thought didn't make any difference? It is powerful after all. In fact, it is the most powerful thing you could possibly do to help them. I can't wait to get to heaven and find out how God used each (seemingly insignificant) prayer that we offered Him.... :-) 

Sometimes (No, at ANY time)

The most loving thing you can possibly do for a person



Is pray for them.

:-)

I Claim this Song - This One is for ME Tonight :-)

I am tired.

Life is tiring. 

I want my life to be purposeful.

Make my heart be still before your majesty, God. 

The one place I can truly find rest

from all this chaos and discouragement 

is before your throne. 

David had it right, as he praised you with his songs in the still places. 

Mary had it right, as she listened at your feet,

enjoying the gift of your presence more than anything else. 

Feed my soul with your words, Bread of Life.

My heart cries out for meaning, 

and then runs from the very thing that can fulfill it. 

My quiet time with you. 

Help me not be afraid by the fear in me. 

Help me not be owned by the things that I own. 

Help me not fight my flesh with more flesh. 

(There is definitely a war within.)

But at your throne

My flesh fades and the devil flees. 

My enemies cannot coexist in your presence. (Glory be!)

So find me here, Jesus. Over and over again. 

At your feet. 

Missing South Africa

This just makes me smile. 

The accent.

The energy. 

The message. 

I want to go back....

Can't Live Without It

"Prayer is the easiest and hardest of all things.

The only thing which does any good - makes all else we do efficient. 

A holy life does not live in the closet, but it cannot live without the closet."

- E. M. Bounds

Are You the Good Type of Holy or the Bad Type?

Yes, I am serious! There are two kinds, from what I can see in Scripture and in my own life.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with desiring MORE holiness. The purer the better - the more innocent toward sin, the closer to the heart of God. (Have I sparked your curiosity yet?)

1. "Holier than thou" means the praise goes back to me and my good works that measure up "above" someone else's. The reason for this type of holiness reflects the same reason the Pharisees desired to be holy.... so they could look down on the rest of those who were not choosing the same.

2. "Holier than I am right now" means all praise goes back to God for helping me come gradually closer to measuring up with HIS holiness. The whole reason for this kind of holiness is so that people will see the light of Christ and the truth of His Gospel.

"If then your whole body is full of light, having no part dark, it will be wholly bright, as when a lamp with its rays gives you light." 

Matthew 11:36

Spidey Tape

So....

I've got a friend in our family (whose name I drew for Christmas) and she loves Spiderman. But she is virtually MY age, so I was thinking an action figure doesn't exactly cut it. 

But look what I found today!

I'm pretty excited. I'm thinking a wallet and a lanyard, and then give her the rest of the roll too. Any other ideas? 

Grace Trails

Well hello, little blog. I realize I haven't touched you in a while.... Life has definitely had it's shares of joys and pains lately. Remember how I told you about God at work in me? Well, I'll have to save that story for another time very soon.

I just jumped on here because I wanted so much to share this thought with you:

Have you ever been taken down a "Bible Rabbit - Trail"? (I love these because usually when they happen, things I heard all my life suddenly make all the more sense as a reality in my life!)
Have you ever heard this jewel of a verse that's nestled in John 14?
"Whoever has my commandments and keeps them, he is is that loveth me."

Rabbit - Trail #1 What are these commandments to which He is referring? That seems rather stiff and daunting. The disciples listening knew enough about the Old Testament commands that had been passed down through Moses. There seemed to be a gazillion of them, and no human could get them all right!
But remember, Jesus gave them the new command in just the chapter before, "love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another." The first and greatest commandment He classifies as "love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, and strength."
So, THESE are the commands that are specifically directed to us, as followers of Jesus. And according to John 14:21, if we hold them close and DO them, it proves our love for Him.

Are you with me? I know it could be easy to zone out during all this word-y-ness, but I want so badly for you to get it. Because this is awesome stuff! The next part of John 14:21 tells us,
"And he who loves me will be loved of my Father"

Rabbit - Trail # 2  Can you believe it!? This same Father who would not tolerate a speck of sin in His sight. The same Father who sees the wandering hearts of us on earth and calls us an adulterous generation, wicked and perverse - He will love anyone in the world who chooses Jesus, the only name under heaven whereby we must be saved. And by the way, love for Jesus is not - no not ever! - something to be ashamed about.

Which brings us to the last portion of the verse. "And I will love him and manifest myself to him." 

Rabbit - Trail # 3  Whenever I see the word "manifest" I automatically exchange for the phrase, "make bigger." As a result of our choosing to love Christ, He will no longer be a mystery. Instead, He will purposely be "made bigger" in our line of vision. He will reward those who diligently seek Him with... Himself. In order to get more of Christ, you have to WANT more of Him. If you knock on that door He promises it will be opened. If you ask, you receive.
You might be familiar with the verse that explains, in the end we shall be like Him, for we shall see Him as He is.
That brought it all together for me.... Not just for my future, but for my "now"! As I love Him more, making conscience choices day by day that draw me closer to Him rather than farther away, then He will start to show me more of who He is. I'll start to see what He really looks like, instead of what I just always imagined or desired Him to be. And as Jesus shows me more of Himself, than I can't help but be like Him!

In all His splendor, His glory and righteousness, wisdom, gentleness and ultimate love, how could I catch a glimpse of Him and not begin to incorporate it into my own life?

Sometimes, especially lately, this walk feels like an uphill battle. But sometimes I make life too complicated. Living for Him is really just a beautiful cycle of

loving Christ  --------   seeing Him

seeing Christ ---------   emulating Him 

emulating Christ ------ loving Him. 

So friends, I've got news for you. We are not under the Law and the Commandments anymore! Christ has come and brought the new perspective with Him. We live in the Age of Grace now, not to take advantage of it for our own gain but to take full advantage of it to HIS glory and gain.

It's crazy, even though I've known all these pieces of the truth for a while, it's taken these rabbit-trails of thought to penetrate the reality of the grace concept deeper into my heart. I suppose then, you could call them "Grace - Trails."(But you don't have to if you think that's a little corny. :-)

Well, I should go to bed. I've written much more than I had anticipated tonight and I'm going to be tired working both jobs tomorrow. Thanks for listening to my ramblings, little blog.